Sunday, July 18, 2010

Drunk Hulk Smash Twitter!


I am burnt out on all this social networking—didn’t Prince just say that it’s all passé now?.  Facebook and Twitter seem to have one purpose, which is to sell you products via direct targeted marketing.  I’ve deactivated my Facebook, but keep my Twitter account going, because of one man: DRUNK HULK!  I always get a chuckle when I see one of his tweets.  Drunk Hulk slings off one liners as easily as Steven Wright.

Here are a few choice examples.  For instance, the ongoing saga of Bristol Palin:
BRISTOL AND LEVI BACK TOGETHER! DRUNK HULK NO BE THIS UPSET ABOUT REUNION SINCE STEPHENIE MEYER REUNITE WITH TYPEWRITER!
ARGENTINA MAKE GAY MARRIAGE LEGAL! LEVI AND BRISTOL MAKE JOKE OF MARRIAGE IN AMERICA! ONE STEP FORWARD! TWO STEP BACK!
Oh yes, Drunk Hulk always types with CAPS ON!  On Mel Gibson:
DRUNK HULK BET MEL GIBSON WISH HE MAKE SEX TAPE LIKE OTHER CELEBRITY DO INSTEAD!
On the Sixth Sense / Last Airbender Director’s career:
DRUNK HULK JUST FIGURE OUT TWIST! M NIGHT SHYMALAN CAREER WAS DEAD WHOLE TIME!
On Kristen Stewart’s acting—appropriately, I read this after watching Adventureland:
DRUNK HULK LIKE KRISTEN STEWART! SHE METHOD ACTOR! SHE NO EVER BREAK CHARACTER! SHE ACT MISERABLE ALL TIME! THAT COMMITMENT!
On the economy:
TEEN EXPERIENCE WORST SUMMER JOB MARKET IN 41 YEAR! OH NO! NOW WHO WILL TREAT DRUNK HULK CONDESCENDING AT THE STARBUCK
On this year’s summer movies:
SUMMER MOVIE SEASON AWFUL! DRUNK HULK MOVIE SUMMER USUAL FEEL LIKE VAN HALEN! AND THIS YEAR SAMMY HAGAR TOOK OVER!
A cool idea for an amusement part for adults—which also reveals the fact that Drunk Hulk is literate:
HARRY POTTER PARK AT UNIVERSAL SUCCESS! DRUNK HULK HOPE THEY DO HENRY MILLER TROPIC OF CANCER PARK NEXT!
Looking back at Drunk Hulk’s younger days:
DRUNK HULK PRETEND BE BACK IN COLLEGE! FIRST LISTEN TO BEST OF BOB MARLEY! DRINK LOT! AND THEN BE LESBIAN FOR SIX MONTH!
NEW APPLE PRODUCT! A-TEAM! KARATE KID IN CINEMA! ALL DRUNK HULK NEED IS WHAM AND WHERE BEEF! AND IT 1984 ALL OVER AGAIN!
If I were Marvel, I’d hire this guy to write a Drunk Hulk TV show.  Hey, it worked for Shit My Dad Says.  Nuff Said!

Link:  Drunk Hulk Interview on Cover Stories.

Update: Comment from my old MT blog...


1 Comments

I appreciate being compared to Stephen Wright. That's certainly high praise. I'm glad you enjoy Drunk Hulk. I always appreciate it when people take the time to write about the big guy.
Great site, by the way!

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